Remembering Simone de Beauvoir

Betty Friedan talks about meeting Simone de Beauvoir and The Second Sex. Kate Millet then speaks to us about de Beauvoir's autobiographies: Memoirs of a Dutiful Daughter, The Prime of Life, Forces of Circumstance, and All Said and Done.

Controlling and Un-Controlling the Birds*

Letting a caged bird go is GOOD, but at the same time BAD.  It has consequences.

If the birdy flies away and never comes back, something went wrong… somehow… =(


If it comes back, it LOVES you, and wants to stay with you because you treated it well in the past and nothing too horrible happened to it in that environment you have so little control over.

So, how ‘bout those categories, man and woman?  (Or black and white, or worker and boss, or student and teacher, etc)?

Can men just let go of “their” women, and start letting them live the life they desire with them?  I know it’s very, very hard [I’m not as clear on this issue. I haven’t been raised as “Man”, whatever that is.  You get my drift? I hope so. = )]. But we know that women get hurt, raped, abused when going to bars with her girlfriends and getting looks and men intruding on her unwillingly.  It’s like rape of the eyes. Men look at women and women want to hide because they are so scared of the pain! They’ll hurt without you, but they’ll also hurt with you if you keep her waiting and worrying.  ANYWAYS, don’t fret over my words; we know she’ll come back to you if you truly know in your heart that you love her. ; ) The only true way to know she loves you is if you show it and you *know* she senses it and responds in laughter and smiles.

And, women, can we let our men go?  It feels like we shouldn’t, doesn’t it? They go to war, and they fight in bars and come back broken? They accidentally cripple others with their rage?  = ( Makes me want to cry.  But if you don’t let them go, they’ll just never come back.  We give them our whole selves and then they throw us back like garbage.  We clean up after them, we clean their kitchens and cook, we laugh at their jokes, we try to live beneath their shade as the sun penetrates just so we can BE. I know we wish they could see how much we love them and how much they hurt us, but maybe letting go isn't so bad after all? I know it hurts, but I’m done with the pain, and the sooner we’re done with the pain, the sooner we can see the LIGHT of DAY.

For all those guys (and ladies), here is someone who can help: 

Hard-Fi - 'Fire In The House' [OFFICIAL VIDEO]

 For all those gals (and gents), here is someone who can explain it in a different way:

Universal Solider by First Aid Kit [Official Video]

Also, for good measure, when we talk to others, let's take into consideration the Ancient Egyptian, Ptahhotep:

"Do not gossip in your neighbourhood, because people respect the silent."

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*Sheesh the word “uncontrolling” doesn’t even exist in Word 2010! I had to put “un-controlling”.  What’s up with that?  I guess we just don’t understand the concept of “uncontrolling” as much... So, if you'll let me, I'll make a leap and I hope you can trust me. Why isn't there a word for "uncontrolling" in word 2010?  Maybe it doesn't exist? Maybe it just doesn't have it? My guess, it exists but Word 2010 just doesn't recognize it.  Maybe Word 2012 when it comes around. = )

Gail Dines on Pornography & Pop Culture

Gail Dines talks in this lecture about the pornography industry.  She begins  by talking about the history of pornography, and Playboy and Hustler's begining in Capitalist America.

She continues on to talk about our image culture, where stereotypes of femininity and masculinity are continually bombarded upon us through magazines, movies, celebrities, music, etc.  She speaks of Jessica Simpson, who has become the laughing stalk of American media (just as Goldie Hawn and Meg Ryan were before her).  She states that when we laugh at her, we laugh at every woman because it reinforces those very stereotypes about women. 

Food For Though: The Reader Inscribed in the Text: When you look at an image of a person in a magazine, who is the presumed spectator of the image?  Who is the image geared to?  What is the image trying to communicate?  She then talks about the "fuck me" look; this image is bombarded upon men in our culture, and it is what this image to the right illustrate.

She then goes on to talk about the glamorization of the "perfect"  woman for men in our culture, shifting from the "perfect housewife" image to the "slut, brainless" image of women.  She speaks about Britney Spears, Paris Hilton, Anna Nicole Smith, and Pamela Anderson who are given stardom but then spitted out by our culture for being "whores" and useless.

Lastly, she speaks about the porn industry and the glamorization of violence against women within the porn industry.  Gail Dines ends the lecture by stating that she isn't against porn itself but the culture that is perpetuated within the porn industry, and I couldn't agree more.

Update:  Here is Gail Dines website